Gro Carting

Conventional wisdom says the melting pot is working--we’re becoming homogenized Americans. 

We’ve gone through a half-century of population mobility, regardless of race, ethnicity, or religion.  Few stayed were they were born.  The young went off to pursue advanced education, promising jobs, or both. The old sold the family home and moved to enjoy final years in kinder climates and with other oldsters in communities built just for them. 

In the process, we’ve been losing those charming regional accents along with differences in manners and traditions.  We increasingly find the same big-box stores in every state.  The Golden Arches loom everywhere, and their proprietors go to great lengths to fry the stuff the same way at every location.

Knowing all this, we were surprised to spot a cultural difference the first time we made an extended visit to southwestern Michigan in 2006.  It was no fluke.  We’ve verified it hundreds of times since we moved here from Utah three years ago.

People in southwestern Michigan put shopping carts in the racks after they unload the groceries. Empty carts are rarely seen scattered about in parking lots.

In Utah, carts are left all over the place, and some abandoned ones are spotted blocks and even miles away from the store. 

Place in rack, please.

The signs imploring customers to put the empty carts in the racks are the same. Literacy rates are equal. The weather is similar, and thus not a factor.  We’d even give Utah an edge in that department.  The stores and lots are virtually identical.  So why do almost all the people here pay attention to the cart-return signs, while so many in Utah do not?

We’ve pondered the cart corral question at length without developing a glimmer of a theory for the cause.  Any ideas out there?

We do know that if you’re a parking lot neatnik, southwestern Michigan is the place for you.  You may get the bonus of seeing a gray haired geezer wearing a Packers shirt launch his empty cart at the rack and raise his hands to signify three points whenever his cart splits the uprights. It causes a lot of laughs in Michigan parking lots.  Bet you won’t see that elsewhere in the U.S.A.

Northwoods Wants

The geezer doesn’t spend much time reading a weekly electronic edition of my hometown newspaper.  Members of my immediate family are long gone.  Even my interest in the obituaries is declining as fewer and fewer familiar names show up. 

A visit to the want ad section is extremely rare. Yet something drew my eye there in the April 17 edition of the Tomahawk Leader. I found this entry:

WANTED:  Double-barrel shotgun. Also: A girlfriend. Each need not be real pretty but proper functioning is important (Need not be a single transaction). 715-612-1680.

At least one north woods denizen hasn’t lost the somewhat quirky sense of humor long associated with the area.  If you’ve got the goods and  want to make a deal with him, call the number.

Musical Hits and Misses

Complete records for the 1940 census were released this month, touching off a wave of interest among those bent on studying their family roots. 

The geezer invested a couple of hours searching the census documents.  I found my grandmother, Ottila Klade. She was 75 years old in 1940.  A few pages later, up popped mom and dad, my sister, and me.  It was fun using the search tool to travel down our street and others in the old hometown, revisiting families we knew well while I was growing up.

The census entries reveal many things about the “greatest generation.”  What were their occupations? What did they earn? How many years of education did each person have? Were they citizens? Were they born in the U.S., or elsewhere?

It appears that many people interested in various facets of American history have seen the release of the 1940 census data as a good time to develop and issue pronouncements about their areas of interest.  Zipping around the Internet, it’s easy to learn who the top sports stars were in the 40s, what models of autos were in vogue, what clothing designs were popular, and many other things, great and not so. 

Of course, we simply must know what music was favored by the greatest generation.  Several Internet sites fulfill that need.

One source says these were the top five popular songs in the 1940s:

1. In The Mood

2. When You Wish Upon a Star

3. I'll Never Smile Again

4. Only Forever

5. Body & Soul

For comparison, an unscientific survey shows these titles seemed to be the top pop songs of 2010:

1. Baby, Baby

2. Oooooh, Baby

3. Baby, Oh  Baby

4. Baby, Baby, Baby

5. Yeah, Baby, Yeah

That’s progress?

Half an Education

Last month,  Encyclopaedia Britannica ended a 244-year tradition with the announcement it would no longer print its books.  Like a growing number of publishers, it will now make its product available only electronically. 

The company said for some years the data base has been too big to fit in a printed version.  That is big as in huge; the last print edition fills 32 volumes. 

The Britannica books once were considered the repository of most human knowledge.  World Book was its only real competitor in the U.S. Although World Book still has a print edition, computers have pretty much made printed encyclopedias obsolete, first with CD versions and now with Wikipedia plus a variety of search engines.

Both Britannica and World Book were sold by an army of door-to-door salespeople for many years.   A set of encyclopedias was displayed in most middle-class homes in the U.S., even in those where reading clearly was not a top priority.  Having a set of encyclopedias was a status symbol.  The very successful had Britannicas; lesser beings owned World Books.

Reading was the dominant activity in our home, but we had only one moderately sized bookcase.  All of us had public library cards, and we used them often.  Financial investments in reading material went to subscriptions for magazines (Colliers, Good Housekeeping, and the Saturday Evening Post) and newspapers (one weekly and three dailies). The subscriptions took a big chunk of the disposable income around our place, but my parents considered the magazines and newspapers indispensable.

Dad tried to equip our home with World Books, even though a set cost a lot of scarce dollars back in the 1930s. Dad made a deal with one of the salesmen.  He started buying one volume at a time on a budget plan. Unfortunately, conditions took a turn for the worse in the family business, and only half a set of encyclopedias was in our bookcase when Dad was forced to end his buying program.

I loved to read the World Book volumes we had.  But if a quiz show ever issues an invitation to me, I’ll need to decline on grounds I'd be fairly good on items from A through M, but not nearly so wise beyond that.

“M” was as far as “human knowledge” went in our home when I was growing up and eager to absorb it all. 

Twice as many World Books as we owned.

Those Kirtland's Warbler Calls

I’ve not been privileged to see a Kirtland’s warbler or even to listen to one’s song, except on recordings.  Yet the little bird inspired calls that figured in my life on two occasions.

It’s not unusual for people interested in the warbler to never have encountered one.  As humans gradually eliminated the Kirtland’s nesting habitat, the bird’s summer range diminished until it became a rare bird. 

A little bird with a lot of friends (USFS Photo: Joel Trick)

My first Kirtland’s warbler call came on May 5, 1980.  I was serving as the Public Information Officer in the Milwaukee headquarters of the Eastern Region of the U.S. Forest Service.  My boss phoned me at home and told me to get ready for an early morning trip to Michigan.  He said a planned fire had gotten away and I was needed to help answer media and congressional inquiries.  I got the details on an auto trip to Mio after a Forest Service plane dropped me off in Cadillac.

Ranger District personnel had started a fire to burn debris in a logged area south of Mio.  The plan was to create good conditions for planting jack pine seedlings that would become prime nesting habitat for the warbler.  The fire escaped.  It burned 20,000 acres and destroyed or damaged 44 dwellings in the Village of Mack Lake.  A Forest Service wildlife biologist was killed while he was trying to stop the blaze in its early stages.

I was almost immediately deluged with phone calls.  Among other things, I had no place to sleep, so I bedded down for a few hours on the floor of the county assessor’s office where I’d been given some work space.  I don’t remember having time to eat anything until mid-morning of my second day on the job.

The Forest Service launched investigations of the circumstances of the Mack Lake Fire’s start, and of the employee death. I was involved in a small way in the main investigation after the fire was over, and wrote a news release announcing the results that got major play in the media. The approach was to be painfully honest about everything concerning the fire. The Forest Service investigation report said the fire should not have been started that day. The report stuck to the facts, as did my news release.  

I transferred to the Intermountain West a few months after the Mack Lake Fire and heard almost nothing about the Kirtland’s warbler until about five years ago.  The phone call was from a Bill Rapai, who said he was writing a book about the warbler, and I was one of the few people still living who played a key role in the Mack Lake Fire. He thought the fire would be an emphasis item in his story.  Would I answer a few questions?

The few questions became quite a few, and my memory was being taxed to the limit almost 30 years after the incident, so I requested written questions.  Rapai’s e-mailed questions and my answers totaled about 3,000 words in seven pages.  From all that verbiage, the author described my part in the story in about 400 words included in two long paragraphs.  That probably is one paragraph more than the importance of my work deserved.

I just finished reading “The Kirtland’s Warbler: The Story of a Bird’s Fight against Extinction and the People Who Saved It,” by William Rapai. It was published recently by The University of Michigan Press, and is available at all the usual book sales places. 

One thing needs clarification.  I am not one of the warbler saviors.  Over the years, several individuals did devote much energy and time to help prevent the extinction of the little bird, and their work is described in detail in the book.  There may be more heroes in the future. Experts believe that the bird cannot survive without continuing human manipulation of its habitat, and there is opposition to the types of work required.

Rapai is the president of the Grosse Pointe (Michigan) Chapter of the Audubon Society. He has been a successful newspaper writer and editor, and it shows. He presents historic material that could be dry reading in a compelling way, and adds interest throughout the book with many anecdotes.  His book is an easy-to-read guide to what’s known about the warbler plus descriptions of current preservation work and research aimed at gaining more knowledge.

What’s the bottom line?  Kirtland’s warbler numbers are up dramatically, and nests recently have been found in several areas outside Michigan. The warbler soon may be removed from the federal endangered species list.

How did that happy turn of events come about? Was the otherwise tragic Mack Lake Fire a positive force in helping the little bird with the big voice survive and thrive? Get a copy of “The Kirtland’s Warbler,” enjoy a good read, and find out.

A Ford in Our Future?

We’re hoping a family chariot replacement is still down the road a bit, but beautiful wife Sandy and I have been checking out new cars in a preliminary way.  We love our aging Pontiac, but it won’t last forever.

I’ve been leaning toward a Ford as a replacement for several reasons: (1) Ford has been producing high-quality vehicles in recent years; (2) Ford has several models that fit most of our needs; (3) Ford deserves a little edge for having good management in troubled times (it didn’t need government loans to survive the Great Recession); and (4) Ford is an American company.  Even if some parts and models are produced elsewhere, a good share of the corporate profits comes back to Michigan, and right where cash is most needed within the state.

I quit leaning Ford’s way Saturday.  The news from Detroit was that Ford CEO Alan Mulally’s compensation last year totaled a breathtaking $29.5 million.  That was up 11 percent from the year before.  That amounted to $5 for every vehicle Ford sold.

I believe that people who do exceptional work should be rewarded for it.  Mulally has done exceptional work.  Ford registered good profits for three consecutive years after he took over.  Stock prices soared.  It appears that Ford’s strategies under Mulally will carry the corporation forward for some time to come.

BUT, who on this earth is worth nearly $30 million for one year’s work?  Mulally is correct in saying much of his pay depends on performance bonuses.  He does earn his pay.  The problem is that his base pay is outrageously high and the bonuses ridiculously generous.  This is the kind of stuff that the “99 percent” is up in arms about.  This sort of tremendous gulf between the ultra rich and everyone else is not good for our society.

I have some issues with the “99 percent,” including that they represent a much lower percentage of Americans than their slogan implies.  BUT, if a lot of them think Mulally and other corporate execs are grossly overpaid, we are in agreement on that point.

Now I’m leaning toward a Prius.  If Mulally is in serious financial straits when we are ready to buy one, I’ll send him $5.

A Lot More to It

If you want to delve further into geezer viewpoints about “Obamacare” and the present Supreme Court consideration of it, see the comments after the previous post. Indeed, much more can be said about health care in the U.S.

Trashing "Obamacare"

As it deliberates constitutional issues posed by “Obamacare,” the U.S. Supreme Court probably is using the proper name for the health insurance reform act, but no one else is. I'm not even sure what it is.

As children, we taunted verbal attackers with the chant: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”  The sentiment was laudable, but the truth was questionable.  Words can hurt a lot.  Words intended to hurt a lot also can backfire.

Consider the “Cheesehead” label hung as an insult on Wisconsin football fans some years ago by rival team backers.  Rather than hunkering down and trying to ignore the name hoping it would go away, Wisconsinites enthusiastically adopted it. Now strange cheesy hats and slogans abound. Residents of the Dairy State are proud to proclaim themselves Cheeseheads.

“Obamacare,” coined by right-wing media, was embraced by Republican strategists as a derisive term they thought surely would help them gain followers as they try to overturn the administration’s health care reforms.  It’s not working quite that way.

Michele Bachmann (R-Minn) attacks Obamacare. Was that a mistake? (Wilson/Getty Images)

One of the Democratic Party’s chief strategists, David Axelrod, recently said, “Hell yeah, I’m for Obamacare.” He said that when stating his belief that millions of people will become strong supporters of the new health care provisions once they all go into effect and are fully understood.

Like Axelrod, many rank-and-file Democrats are starting to use the Republican term, proclaiming at every opportunity they are proud Obamacare fans.

Anti-Obamacare T-shirts have been around for a while. Pro-Obamacare T-shirts are on the horizon. Obamacare headgear?  That may be a difficult design problem.

The elevation of Obamacare to the Supreme Court caused many Americans who previously were uninformed about the provisions of the law to become aware of the benefits. We’ll have to wait until June or July to learn whether the court approves or strikes down the law or its key parts.  Some Democrats smell a political win no matter how the decision goes.

The court consists of five members who usually lean in Republican directions and four who tend to favor Democratic Party positions.  If the court scraps Obamacare, Democrats believe they will be handed a winner in the presidential election campaign as they blame Republicans for stripping away health benefits for millions who need a guaranteed way to get insurance.  If the court allows Obamacare to stand, the Demos will claim that the GOP’s most erudite adherents backed the Democrat’s health care plan when it was thoroughly examined at the highest level.

Which T-shirt will you be wearing?

Purely a Bailout

A happy group of owners and managers of resorts, hotels, sporting goods stores, and various tourist attractions has gathered this weekend to try to convince our governor to permanently cement their hands into our taxpaying pockets.

It is safe to say many of these entrepreneurs strongly opposed on ideological grounds federal taxpayer support for financial institutions that saved our, and probably the world, financial system just a couple of years ago.  Never mind that the banking loans have largely been repaid.  And don’t bother to mention that the federal government turned a profit by collecting interest on large chunks of the emergency money.  Bailouts are bad, say conservative business owners.

Apparently,  taxpayer financing is only “creeping socialism” outside “the proper role of government” when it goes to someone else.

The tourism conferees have gathered in Grand Rapids to consider “Delivering on the Pure Michigan Promise.”  Pure Michigan is a promotional campaign designed to lure vacationers to come to the state to experience Michigan’s wonders.  We do have many attractions, including great natural beauty in the coastal and northern areas. It seems only good and right that resources should be allocated to telling the Pure Michigan story. The question is: “Whose resources?”

State support for tourism is nothing new here or elsewhere.  However, with Michigan’s economy reeling from one job loss after another in 2008, Governor Jennifer Granholm took it big time.  She transferred $45 million from a job trust fund to finance the Pure Michigan ad campaign for three years.   The campaign went national. Now there’s talk about wooing international visitors.

Current Governor Rick Snyder, who is an avowed budget cutter in some areas, has proposed a $25 million budget item to continue the Pure Michigan campaign next year. The program is run by the Michigan Economic Development Corporation’s Travel Michigan Division.  It claims to have created $2 billion in new tourism spending since 2006.

This year there’s a new wrinkle to the ad campaign.  Two cities, Mackinac Island, and the Henry Ford Museum in Dearborn are chipping in several million dollars in total to assure they will be featured in some Pure Michigan ads. Aha, that’s a good thing.  Some of those who stand to benefit are willing to pick up a share of the tab.

The tourist industry has conducted a spirited public relations campaign trying to demonstrate that Michigan benefits from about $3 in tax revenue for every $1 invested in the tourism campaign. Wonderful.  Of course there is no mention that the owners of  tourism-related businesses are the chief beneficiaries of the taxpayer investments.  Other statistics show the Michigan tourism sector recovering at a rapid pace from the Great Recession.

Pure Michigan is such a good deal that the industry people now are pushing for a mechanism to ensure long-term state funding.  “Anything the legislature creates, they can uncreate,” the vice president of the Michigan Travel Council is reported to have said.  He said he thought the currently proposed $25 million budget item was “adequate.”

I say if the program is so wonderful those business owners, communities, and tourist attraction operators who benefit should be willing to pay for all of it.  This could be arranged over time with some simple legislation.  How about this:

Approve the $25 million budget item for next year only.  Mandate that it then will be reduced by $1 million each year for the next 25 years.  If those who benefit  want to maintain the program indefinitely, they could make contributions to replace the million dollar annual withdrawal of taxpayer money.

The tourism industry people would continue to enjoy their bailout for a long time, but their hands gradually would be withdrawn from our pockets.

A Benefit of Age

We often dwell on the negatives of advancing years.  Prime topics are loses of strength, agility, keen eyesight, and memory.  The more-frequent aches and pains, unfortunately, not only hurt us but aggravate others when we feel compelled to complain about them.

Better to lie and respond with the traditional, “Fine,” when someone inquires about the status of our health.

My office--back when it was reasonably tidy.

And maybe we mature adults are just fine if we stop to think deeply about our situations.  For some weeks, I’ve been flogging myself mentally for not cleaning up the mess that has become my previously neat and tidy office.  Yesterday, I decided I should just forgive myself for the sloppiness and live with the litter.

We’ve recently moved away from most of our close friends.  Our only consistent visitors now are considerably younger family members.  They seldom have the temerity to criticize my actions, or lack thereof, at least to my face.

It’s a lot more fun to check out the latest computer game or crossword puzzle or take a walk in the woods than to spend any valuable time dusting, vacuuming, and putting things in order. Manana probably will be a better day for a cleanup project, anyway.

It’s a good thing to be a fully mature adult.

Brits Have a Word for It

For some time, I’ve been entertained by posts at www.oldgit.wordpress.com created by “Big John.”  John liberally sprinkles British slang into his observations, which makes his wit even more delightful.

If, like me, you need a little help with meanings of some expressions tossed around in the UK, just as people who really speak English need help understanding “American,” here are a few tips to aid you with the article below.  The post is reproduced here with John’s permission.  “Nick” is a prison. “Old lag” refers to a convict.  “Banged up” means locked up in a cell.  John has defined one of my favorites, “starkers,” for us, and context explains “naughty bits” adequately.

John once described himself as a “born again atheist.” Knowing that helps in appreciating his post. Enjoy.

Should they go nude in the ‘nick’ ?

Posted by Big John on March 13, 2012

As one who thinks that the world would be a much better place without religion, I must admit to having a soft spot for the poor old pagans, as I can’t help but feel that history gave them a raw deal and a bad press with all that stuff about human sacrifice and dirty old druids chasing naked virgins by moonlight.

Even today they are discriminated against, as I found out when I learned a wonderful new word .. “skyclad” .. It means .. ’starkers’ .. and refers to the pagan practice of performing religious rituals while ‘au natural’.

Now I’m not sure why they need to display their naughty bits when dancing around their pentagrams, or whatever it is that they do, but it seems that some bloke in the ‘nick’ is a bit pissed off that he can’t; and another pagan ’old lag’ is upset because he is not allowed to wear a hooded robe.

I can’t see what harm would be done by granting these cons’ requests, for I’m sure that the members of other faiths are allowed to wear and use religious items, such as yarmulkes in the case of Jews and prayer mats in the case of Muslims. So why not banged-up ‘Ancient British believers’ ? .. Blimey ! .. It’s not as if they are asking for a megalithic monument to be erected in the exercise yard.

I bet the lawyers are queuing up outside the gates at this moment and booking flights to Strasbourg to appear before the European Court of Human Rights on behalf of these ‘persecuted’ pagans, and, for once, I support them. In fact I’m thinking of organising a ‘skyclad’ protest march … When ? … Well, perhaps …

… when the weather gets a bit warmer.

Ancient stonework might not work well in a prison yard.

Kalamazoo, Of Course

A couple of TV stars showed up in Kalamazoo last week, and of course there had to be some questions about the uniquely named city.

Jonathan and Drew Scott, the “Property Brothers” on HGTV’s home remodeling show, came to town for weekend appearances at the Home Expo, an annual event featuring local builders and various products offered to homemakers.  In a newspaper interview, Jonathan said one of the most frequent questions posed by their fans lately was, “Is Kalamazoo a real place?”

A view of downtown Kazoo. It's real.

How could anyone question the existence of Kalamazoo?  Didn’t Glenn Miller immortalize the place by writing and playing that big-band musical hit, “I’ve Got a Gal in Kalamazoo?” Weren’t those famous Checker taxi cabs manufactured in Kalamazoo?  What expert angler never cast for the big fish with a Kalamazoo-made Shakespeare reel? And, thousands of  music lovers strummed or listened to notes from Gibson "Banner" guitars, fine instruments made for years in Kalamazoo.

Oh, yeah.  Only fully mature adults are likely to remember those things.  So we can forgive a few youngsters in the 13 countries where “Property Brothers” is broadcast if they aren’t convinced of the reality of Kalamazoo.

The question caused the Geezer to reflect on advice in the old Associated Press Style Manual on how to present names of cities in news stories.  The manual said use both the city and state names in the first mention of the community in a story. After that, drop the state name.  But for a major metropolis, omit the state identifier altogether.  Write or say only “Los Angeles” or “Chicago,” not “Los Angeles, CA” or “Chicago, IL.”

Kalamazoo is no major metropolis, but its one-of-a-kind status ought to qualify it for the metropolis rule. Anybody who knows about it knows it’s in Michigan. When you've said Kalamazoo, you've said it all.

A precise location is a bit more difficult.  But, if you lay a ruler on a map on a line between Chicago and Detroit, measure the distance, and divide by two, you will hit pretty close to Kalamazoo.

Kalamazoo also is about 15 miles south of our home, but we’re not a landmark.  We welcome visitors, however.  Just turn on your GPS, set it on Plainwell, Michigan (yes, Plainwell needs a little extra identification) and let one of the marvels of the electronic age guide you to within five miles of us. We then can direct you here for a rest stop and a little visit and then precisely tell you the way to Kalamazoo. It is a real place, and a rather nice one at that.

Phil's Phorecast

Phil and friend (AP Photo)

Today’s date: March 14. Today’s temperature in the shade of my backyard: 79 degrees F.  Puxatawny Phil’s shadow: seen on Feb. 2. Forecast: six more weeks of winter. Days since forecast: 41.  Forty-one divided by seven-day weeks: 5.86 weeks.

Not bad, Phil 

Now please don't dump a foot of snow on us next week.

Gas Pulls Ahead

A few days ago, when I filled the family flivver up in beautiful downtown Plainwell, MI, a gallon of regular cost $3.99.  Here comes $4 gas. Can $5 gas be far away?

My latest gas tab was $52.51.  I bought my first car, a 1929 Model A Ford, back in the early 1950s for $50. Even in its old age, the Ford was a dependable vehicle.  I drove it for about a year and sold it for $55. Nothing approaching a fifty dollar bill was needed to fill it up.  Gas sold for 26 cents a gallon back then.

There were no self-service gas stations, at least where I lived.  Attendants pumped your gas to order.  They also cleaned your car’s windshield and checked the air pressure in the tires.  Those services were free.  I don’t recall seeing anyone giving a tip to an attendant, so it’s fair to assume tipping was nonexistent or at least infrequent.

We young bucks often collected nickels, dimes, and quarters from our buddies, bought a “dollar’s worth’” of gas, and spent a long evening “cruising the drag.”  That was another way to say we were trying to pick up girls who might be walking down the town’s main street. We weren’t very successful, but we were persistent.  We logged a lot of miles.

Some Model A's Still Cruise

Transportation costs certainly have escalated, but they’ve not risen equally.  At the time I bought my well-used Ford for $50, you could get a nice, new family sedan for $2,000.  We bought our nice, new family sedan a few years ago for $21,000.  Do the math.  The modern machine cost 10.5 times what one went for 60 years ago.

Doing the math for gasoline, we find the price has increased more than 15 times over the same six decades. 

Those Canadians, Mexicans, and Nigerians who pump most of the “liquid gold” we use and those Arabs who set the world prices are doing a good job of picking our pockets.  Maybe they finally caught on after observing the machinations of wealthy Texas families on television.

Unfortunately, it’s more likely that oil supplies have started a downward spiral throughout the world. We probably are going to see huge price increases as populations continue to explode and industrialization advances to serve the new hordes of people.   

Put on your hiking shoes, and get that old bicycle out of the garage.  The heyday of the automobile as the centerpiece in American life soon will start fading away.  It may be a great time for innovation.  Would “cruising the drag” on a bicycle built for two (or even a low-powered motor scooter) prove attractive?

Don’t despair, though.  The U.S. has huge coal reserves and recently found ways to extract a whole lot of natural gas. We also are finally fully engaged in developing vehicles powered entirely or mostly by electricity.  The future may be brighter than it appears right now.

He Said, She Said

Describing a not-so-proud moment in the history of a football star (Feb. 2 post, “Look Out, Here Comes Tony!”) reminded me of a similar exploit of my very own. It was not among my finest achievements, but at least I got a mild compliment when it was all over.

Years ago, son Lee and I made an evening trip to the hardware store to gather supplies for a home lighting improvement project.  Among other things, we bought a six-foot length of conduit, and Lee hung onto it through the open passenger side window of our Honda during the short trip to our house.

When we arrived in our garage, and Lee was getting out, somehow my feet got tangled up and I hit the accelerator instead of the brake.  I drove right through the back of the garage.  When the little car came to rest, it sported a flat tire and was hung up teetering back and forth on the concrete wall base. 

Sandy raced out to ask, "Did something explode?"  The next question was,  "How in the world did you do that?"

A wrecker was needed to extricate the car from the battered wall.  When the tow truck operator arrived, he chuckled a bit after inspecting the damage and asked who had been driving.  I confessed.

"Well, at least you're honest, " the towing man said, "The last six guys who did this told me their wives were driving."

In Grateful Memory

Staff Sgt. Ahmed Kousay Altaie (U.S. Army), Ann Arbor, Michigan.  Captured in Bagdad, Iraq, October 2006, and later killed. This month, his were the last remains recovered of those missing from Operation Iraqi Freedom/Operation New Dawn mission.

Afghanistan Again

Oh, puhleeze. Let’s give Karzai six replacement Qurans and get the hell out of there.

A "Flyover Bureaucrat" Lands

It may be hard to believe, but some of the earliest politicians in the U.S. were known to be even more devious than those whose cunning we marvel at today. 

The lack of communications technology made that possible.  A candidate could deliver a speech in one town, take a horse and buggy trip to the next place, and give another speech contradicting his previous words. Without news media, he was unlikely to be caught.  News traveled so slowly that often elections were over before blocs of voters learned they had been duped.

That form of political dishonesty stopped around the end of the nineteenth century, or so we thought.  Telegraph, then telephone, networks made communication swift and reached eventually into every corner of the country.  Large news organizations, such as the Associated Press, linked media.  What a national candidate said in California could be filed by a newspaper reporter and broadcast by a radio station in Massachusetts within minutes.

Today’s politicians may fudge their statements and artfully dodge questions, but they know an outrageous statement made anywhere along the campaign trail will be exposed. They must be more careful than their predecessors about what they say. Or, so we thought.

The Geezer learned of recent campaign rhetoric in Idaho by the Republican candidates that certainly would concern many Americans.  One part of it might have been good for a laugh, something major media like to use to break up dismal news cycles. I’m pretty well tuned into various news sources, yet I heard of the Idaho statements only through a Facebook message from a former fellow employee of the U.S. Forest Service.

The Forest Service manages 20 million acres of National Forest land in Idaho.  Several million of those acres are Congressionally designated Wilderness, priceless wildlands where motorized vehicles are banned and resource extraction largely is prohibited.

Recently, according to the Idaho Statesman, Republican presidential candidates Rick Santorum and Ron Paul proposed selling or transferring the federal lands to private interests or to the state. Mitt Romney got a little more specific. He advocated transferring management of the national forests to states to increase the revenues the lands generate.

There are only a few ways to increase revenues from National Forests.  One is to build roads into what now are roadless Wilderness areas, allow timber cutting there, and encourage mining and grazing, now limited to uses that were grandfathered when the lands were withdrawn from commodity production years ago.  Another is to abandon or seriously relax grazing permit systems and timber harvesting controls on all the lands. These regulations keep yields from the lands sustainable.

Wouldn’t you think millions of Americans would want to know that candidates for president advocated drastic changes in the protection and management of large chunks of our public lands?  Where were our media?  Perhaps they have been so decimated by economic problems that they have no space for such news.  You can bet the Statesman put the story on the wire.

Santorum provided the fodder for comedians.  Speaking to some 3,000 people in Boise, he said: “The federal government doesn’t care about it (Idaho), they don’t care about this land.  They don’t live here, they don’t care about it; we don’t care about it in Washington.  It’s just fly-over country for most of the bureaucrats in Washington, DC.”

Shortly thereafter, Tom Tidwell, Chief of the Forest Service, landed in Boise to discuss cooperative planning in Idaho after a flight from his office in Washington, DC. Santorum gave his speech at a rally held at Capital High School in Boise.  Tidwell is a graduate of Capital High School.

Tidwell began his Forest Service career as a fire management specialist for the Boise National Forest.  Later, he served as Regional Forester, the top administrator, for the service's Northern Region, which includes northern Idaho.  We could hardly expect him to know or care much about Idaho, could we?

As Michigan Goes . . .

Actually, all that usually can be said about how Michigan goes politically is that’s how Michigan went.  The state has a long history of flopping back and forth between selecting Democrats and Republicans in major elections.

Now Mitt Romney, a major flip flopper according to his opponents, has come back to town.  The Republican primary is happening Feb. 28.  Television ads and political commentaries are cluttering up the landscape.

The mud slinging and misrepresentations are not unexpected, but there is one big surprise.  Romney’s father served as a Michigan governor and also head of now-defunct American Motors.  Mitt Romney was born and raised in Michigan.  Mitt Romney could lose the primary election in Michigan.

Far right-wing darling Rick Santorum rose to the top of the polls recently, gaining a virtual tie with Romney. Six months ago no one would have predicted that.  Santorum won support in Michigan, as elsewhere, because of his strong appeal to the tea partiers who are playing major roles in Republican candidate selection.

Western Michigan is full of social conservatives.  Even in eastern areas of the state where most voters normally are progressives, many consider themselves fiscal conservatives, and they are worried about the national debt.  In addition to claiming “favorite son” status, Romney loudly proclaims himself to be a lifelong conservative who would apply business principles to correcting the federal balance sheet.  So why isn’t he running far ahead in his “home” state?

For one thing, Romney’s attempts to portray himself as a local boy who in his words, “always loved Michigan,” are pretty lame.  He did spend his early years at the family home in a suburb of Detroit, where he attended an exclusive prep school.  But after that he hasn’t been seen often in these parts during the past 40 years.

Romney went off to college at Brigham Young University, as many good Mormon boys and girls do.  Bachelor’s degree in hand, he enrolled at Harvard for degrees in law and business.  He founded a financial company in Boston in 1984, entered politics in 1994 by losing a senatorial contest in Massachusetts, and later served as governor of the Bay State. He never has lived in Michigan as an adult.

Santorum and friends are attacking Romney’s conservative credentials at every opportunity.  A major charge is that the “Romneycare” health care plan adopted in Massachusetts while Romney was governor was the model for “Obamacare” enacted at the federal level. 

Romney ran into a problem even when he consistently and steadfastly maintained a conservative position.  He said months ago, and recently repeated to Michigan media, that he opposed federal bailouts of General Motors and Chrysler sponsored by both the Bush and Obama administrations.  It is generally acknowledged that the bailout loans saved both auto manufacturers. 

General Motors recently announced from its world headquarters in Detroit a record breaking profit for 2011.  Chrysler sales have improved mightily.  Both companies are once again hiring in Michigan, and GM is planning plant expansions here and in nearby states. Big chunks of the bailout funds have been repaid.

Continuing to say that the proper course of action was to let GM and Chrysler fail while the federal government stood by doing nothing might draw applause in a tea party caucus, but it doesn’t play well in Detroit. Most Michiganders are ardent supporters of the American auto industry, even those who are anti-union and thus could fall into either the Romney or Santorum camps.

Like Romney, Santorum says he does not believe in government help for corporations, except for tax breaks. However, on any other issue you can name, he leans farther right than Romney, or at least he has convinced many tea partiers that he does. 

Another factor probably will help Santorum.  The Republican-controlled legislature and GOP governor changed primary election rules after they got a firm grip on political power in Michigan.  Until this go-around, voters received a unified ballot and could make choices across party lines at will.  This year, voters in the primaries can use only a Republican or Democratic ballot. It could be that the change won’t have as much effect on cross-over voting as the Republicans apparently hoped for.

There’s much talk on the political grapevine, and some out in the open, about the intention of many dedicated Democrats to ask for a Republican ballot and vote for Santorum.  They believe Obama will have a much easier time in November running against the radical ex-senator than the more moderate Romney.

There could be a little bonus here for Romney. Should he lose the Michigan primary it may not be a mortal blow. He could blame a defeat on those tricky Democrats as he once again exits the state.

We’ll soon see what happens.  As Michigan goes, so might the nation.  But don’t count on it. 

A Real(ty) Misteak

Go to www.realtor.com and navigate to the web page listing 200 Golfview Drive, Plainwell, MI 49080.  The main feature at the site is an excellent aerial view of our driveway, complete with turnaround.

It’s an attractive summer scene, but there are a couple of problems. We don’t live at 200 Golfview.  And our driveway is not for sale.

The driveway down the street at 200 Golfview was for sale until just recently for a hefty sum, but the price included a four-bedroom house.  We are relieved that the present status line on the web page picturing our driveway says, “Not for Sale.” 

Come to think of it, if some driveway fancier shows up offering $60,000 or so, we’ll think seriously about making a deal.  Despite focusing from above the wrong property, the photographer produced a pretty picture.  It may entice buyers. If someone else owned our drive, we no longer would have to do all the snow relocation work that occupies a lot of time around here every winter.

Goodbye, My Friend

“Enjoy it while you can, because the Gazette, at least in the form you are holding, is doomed.  The end may be a few years off, but it is inevitable.”

I wrote those lines, the opening words in an opinion piece published by the Kalamazoo Gazette, in the summer of 2009.  Reading a daily newspaper has been part of my life for more than 60 years. Monday, my newspaper delivery tube was empty.  Gazette management had taken the first big step toward the demise of the newspaper.  It no longer will be delivered to homes seven days a week, as it has been for decades.

Like a tough, old bird diagnosed with terminal cancer, the Gazette is not dying without a struggle.  A top exec of the corporation, which also owns seven other papers in Michigan, has issued numerous glowing statements assuring subscribers that the “new order” of things is vastly superior to the familiar system that put a copy of the newspaper into my hands every day.

We now can have only Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday editions delivered to our homes—at a higher cost than we were paying to receive seven days of deliveries.  To compensate for the cost increase, we can view the Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday editions on the Internet.  Those “papers,” however, do not include special advertising sections.  You can buy daily papers that include the special sections at selected sales outlets. Why anyone would want to do that is mysterious.

Content changes have been made to lure subscribers into being happy about this bewildering new arrangement.  The comics section has been increased. Whoopee!  All editions have expanded in this area by about a third.  I’m a selective comics fan—I love some and ignore others.  All the new ones fall into my “ignore” category.  No longer to be found are those favorites of fully mature adults—Rex Morgan, MD and Mary Worth.  What is a Geezer to do? Fortunately, Prince Valiant has been retained in the Sunday edition, but this provides little solace.

The comics changes were made by management after they apparently ignored a fairly recent survey of readers.  The majority wanted to keep panels such as Rex and Mary.  The majority didn’t want those crappy extra panels now foisted upon us.  Is the new stuff cheaper?

Subscribers now get several pages of business news from the Wall Street Journal (I like). They also get more local sports news (I’m not interested).  They get a very strange opinion page (who cares?).  They can get, on the Internet, an improved “Mlive” that is supposed to cover regional news much better (Well, it’s a tad better, but still inadequate).

I’m a fan of Internet news.  As one, I’ve thoroughly checked out the web editions of the Gazette.  Readers can navigate around in them fairly easily, but they are harder to read than the familiar paper versions, and doing the crossword is well neigh impossible.  I also get a new “instant news” bulletin in my e-mailbox.  I’m trying to be charitable, but is seems to be closer to worthless than worthwhile.

All this strays from the bottom line.  Following a nationwide trend, the Gazette is disestablishing itself through a reversal of how it, and many daily papers, evolved.  The Gazette was established in 1834 as a weekly paper.  Weekly papers in growing markets most often took a first step upward by publishing two days a week (usually Tuesday and Thursday).  Later they went to Monday through Saturday editions.  Finally, they added Sunday to become full-service newspapers.

The only change in the backward spirals appears to be a retreat to a Sunday edition, with no weekday products.  Thus, major “paper papers” once again are becoming weeklies in many places.  The once-proud daily Christian Science Monitor devolved into a weekly months ago. Eventually, it and others traveling in the same direction will join the Gazette in extinction.

Who cares?  Well, all of us should.  The national and international news we get on television and the internet largely is generated by newspaper reporters.  Locally, except for a very few radio and television reports, all the news initially is reported by newspaper people. 

Democratic governments depend on the free-flow of information, and responsible analysis of what it means.  Dictatorships thrive by strangling the press. To me, the demise of “paper papers” is a serious matter.  My 2009 article summed it up this way:

“When newspapers are gone, who will cover the local school board meeting?  Who will cut through secrecy and give us the facts when a city council action smells funny?  Who will expose incompetence or extravagance in government? Who will write thoughtful analyses of the meaning of events?  Who will document the little things—the births, deaths, anniversaries, and business happenings—that collectively become the history of our Nation?

We don’t know, and that is frightening.”

Look Out, Here Comes Tony!

The death of legendary Penn State football coach Joe Paterno produced a sports trivia story that brought back a memory of another gridiron hero and his relationship with Paterno.

The news story, in the Green Bay Press-Gazette, described a small chapter in Packers history new to me.  It seems Paterno almost was hired as the Packers head coach in 1970.  A dozen years earlier, I met one of the men who tried hard to make it happen.

A gentle man . . . most of the time.

Tony Canadeo was an outstanding halfback for the Packers, 1941-52, with a year off for military service. He was the first Packers runner to gain 1,000 yards in a season (1949), and is one of only five Green Bay players to have their jersey number retired.  Canadeo was voted into the pro football hall of fame in 1974. After his playing days ended, he was a popular TV announcer.  He also served on the Packers’ executive committee, which makes the big decisions for the team.

In 1958, because of my first professional job as editor of the weekly paper in De Pere, Wisconsin, I got an invitation to attend a banquet at St. Norbert College.  The college is in De Pere, which is only five miles from Green Bay. Although I didn’t have time to attend all the St. Norbert football games, I ran stories and photos provided by their public relations director.  That year, the Green Knights were undefeated, and my contact said the banquet was a special reward for the players, coaches, and media supporters.  The Press-Gazette sports editor also was invited in appreciation of the paper’s coverage of the team.  Tony Canadeo was to be the banquet speaker.

The PR man said I should come an hour early to a cocktail party hosted by the college president for Canadeo, the Press-Gazette man, and me.  Wow!  Every sports fan in the state knew who Tony Canadeo was, and as a 21-year-old novice small-time newsman I was awed at the prospect of conversing with the great man, a college president, and the leading sports journalist in the area.  It turned out to be an even more intimate gathering.  The Press-Gazette editor bowed out because of a last-minute emergency.

You never know what to expect from a sports star.  A good share of them can be pompous asses.  Others, including some of the most skilled athletes, are regular guys and gals. Tony Canadeo turned out to be one of the latter.  He quickly made me feel comfortable at the little party.  There didn’t seem to be a bit of super-ego in the man.  Far from the tough guy I half-expected, Canadeo was soft-spoken and polite. Ever since that meeting I’ve described him as a good-natured gentleman in discussions of the personalities of sports super stars.

In 1970, according to a story made public only after his death in 2003, Canadeo proved he could drop the calm demeanor and work up a rage with the best of them.

The Packers’ executive committee had fired the coach after a poor season.  When George Allen, their first choice as a replacement, declined the job, the committee interviewed several others and narrowed the choices to successful University of Missouri coach Dan Devine and Paterno, who was building an outstanding record at Penn State.

Paterno had turned down the coaching job with the Pittsburgh Steelers the previous year, but the Packers offered a combination coach-general manager situation.  Paterno apparently liked the idea of that kind of control.  Two reputable people later said Paterno would have taken the Packers job if it was offered, and one public statement he made indicated he was very interested.

The recent Press-Gazette story says Canadeo and another member of the executive committee strongly favored Paterno because the Penn State coach reminded them of Vince Lombardi, the iconic Packers coach.  Paterno and Lombardi both grew up in Brooklyn and were Catholics of Italian descent.  They knew each other dating to the 1940s when they were rival high school coaches.  In the 1960s, Lombardi often consulted Paterno about the abilities of college players.

Despite the Lombardi connection, Canadeo and his associate did not prevail.  The committee voted 5-2 to hire Devine.

When Canadeo heard the news, he became livid, the story goes.  As he left home for the next day’s executive committee meeting, he was so distraught he smashed through the garage door when he backed his car out into the driveway.  A daughter had used the car earlier and left the door up when she came home.  As Canadeo stormed out of the house, he didn’t notice and he hit the garage door opener button, closing the door just before he drove through it.

Devine compiled a dismal record at Green Bay.  Paterno became the top winning coach in college football history.  Perhaps the Packers’ executive board members should have listened to their old halfback who could destroy garage doors with a single mighty burst.