Saturday, August 25, 2012

Alas! Multiple Tragedies Hit News

The geezer learned of three crushing blows to things he holds sacred in a span of just six days recently.

The Green Bay Packers released photos of the latest addition to Lambeau Field, where the geezer attended the first game ever played in that venerable stadium.  The new seating section actually has SEATS instead of benches to make things comfortable for the fans.  What next? A DOME to shield us from the weather? Never.

Gonzo Gonzalez goofed when he down graded the best-known institution in Plainwell, Michigan
John “Gonzo” Gonzalez, entertainment reporter for the Kalamazoo Gazette announced the winners in a contest he personally conducted to determine the top ten ice cream parlors in Michigan.  He rated the Plainwell Ice Cream Company Number Six.  My god, this man has no taste buds. Doesn’t he know Plainwell quality has not varied one iota since the product was named one of the “Seven Wonders of Michigan” just a couple of years ago?

I was so shocked by the frozen treat miscarriage of justice I drove past Plainwell Ice Cream yesterday before I thought to stop for a serving of blueberry swirl in a waffle cone.  That’s pure ice cream heaven, Gonzalez. You must have been smoking the wrong stuff before you did your sampling.

Then came the annual announcement by the Princeton Review of the top party schools in the U.S. My alma mater, the University of Wisconsin-Madison, was relegated to the No. 13 spot.  Good grief.  We were numero uno for years.  Obviously, those hoity toity Princeton people never visited Langdon or State Streets.

Alumni need to rally and make a return to campus complete with kegs and watermelons full of gin to show the current crop of Badgers how it’s done.  This insult must be corrected.

I stopped reading the news for two days.  I didn’t want to find out about any more desecrations of important institutions in my life.   


Dick Feldt said...

Your comment about watermelon and gin brings back a few memories. Add a late evening Mendota pier location, in mid July, and you would have it.

Any comments from Ron?

Dick Klade said...

Ron has not commented, but he is most welcome to do so.

Bill Tischler said...

You write a great blog. All is well in Mad City except this no. 13 business. Hope all is well.

joared said...

What is the world coming to?

little bug said...

Plainwell Ice Cream is the greatest! We was robbed.

Lowell Laitsch said...

I kind of agree with the Princeton Review. Instead of floating down the Langdon Street River of Beer, now all they do is jump around Camp Randall on fall Saturdays'''