What Should I Believe?

Should I believe my ears or my eyes?

When I began the journey home from my favorite supermarket, a radio ad told me I should not vote for Barack Obama because “he spent almost a trillion dollars in stimulus funds that didn’t create a single job.”

Minutes later I negotiated my way through a construction project that began this spring in Plainwell, Michigan. Most of the work will be paid for with federal economic stimulus funds.

The Plainwell project replaces a bridge that was at the top of Michigan’s unsafe structures list, improves motorist and pedestrian safety on and near an important highway interchange, and eliminates most of a major bottleneck on a busy state highway. The project has been planned for a decade, but state government alone didn't have the funds to get the work done.

Private contractors will have been paid nearly $11 million when the work is completed next year. The project would not have happened now or in the foreseeable future without stimulus funding.

As I drove through the work site I saw numerous young men and women clearing the way for giant construction equipment and performing other tasks.  Older workers were driving trucks and operating backhoes and asphalt-laying machines.  Obviously, many jobs were created or saved by the project.

In this case, I’ll believe my eyes.

Last night, Mitt Romney told us for the umpteenth time that government does not create jobs. Oh, well.

Kalamazoo, Of Course

A couple of TV stars showed up in Kalamazoo last week, and of course there had to be some questions about the uniquely named city.

Jonathan and Drew Scott, the “Property Brothers” on HGTV’s home remodeling show, came to town for weekend appearances at the Home Expo, an annual event featuring local builders and various products offered to homemakers.  In a newspaper interview, Jonathan said one of the most frequent questions posed by their fans lately was, “Is Kalamazoo a real place?”

A view of downtown Kazoo. It's real.

How could anyone question the existence of Kalamazoo?  Didn’t Glenn Miller immortalize the place by writing and playing that big-band musical hit, “I’ve Got a Gal in Kalamazoo?” Weren’t those famous Checker taxi cabs manufactured in Kalamazoo?  What expert angler never cast for the big fish with a Kalamazoo-made Shakespeare reel? And, thousands of  music lovers strummed or listened to notes from Gibson "Banner" guitars, fine instruments made for years in Kalamazoo.

Oh, yeah.  Only fully mature adults are likely to remember those things.  So we can forgive a few youngsters in the 13 countries where “Property Brothers” is broadcast if they aren’t convinced of the reality of Kalamazoo.

The question caused the Geezer to reflect on advice in the old Associated Press Style Manual on how to present names of cities in news stories.  The manual said use both the city and state names in the first mention of the community in a story. After that, drop the state name.  But for a major metropolis, omit the state identifier altogether.  Write or say only “Los Angeles” or “Chicago,” not “Los Angeles, CA” or “Chicago, IL.”

Kalamazoo is no major metropolis, but its one-of-a-kind status ought to qualify it for the metropolis rule. Anybody who knows about it knows it’s in Michigan. When you've said Kalamazoo, you've said it all.

A precise location is a bit more difficult.  But, if you lay a ruler on a map on a line between Chicago and Detroit, measure the distance, and divide by two, you will hit pretty close to Kalamazoo.

Kalamazoo also is about 15 miles south of our home, but we’re not a landmark.  We welcome visitors, however.  Just turn on your GPS, set it on Plainwell, Michigan (yes, Plainwell needs a little extra identification) and let one of the marvels of the electronic age guide you to within five miles of us. We then can direct you here for a rest stop and a little visit and then precisely tell you the way to Kalamazoo. It is a real place, and a rather nice one at that.

A Real(ty) Misteak

Go to www.realtor.com and navigate to the web page listing 200 Golfview Drive, Plainwell, MI 49080.  The main feature at the site is an excellent aerial view of our driveway, complete with turnaround.

It’s an attractive summer scene, but there are a couple of problems. We don’t live at 200 Golfview.  And our driveway is not for sale.

The driveway down the street at 200 Golfview was for sale until just recently for a hefty sum, but the price included a four-bedroom house.  We are relieved that the present status line on the web page picturing our driveway says, “Not for Sale.” 

Come to think of it, if some driveway fancier shows up offering $60,000 or so, we’ll think seriously about making a deal.  Despite focusing from above the wrong property, the photographer produced a pretty picture.  It may entice buyers. If someone else owned our drive, we no longer would have to do all the snow relocation work that occupies a lot of time around here every winter.

He’ll Be There


A trusted commentator, who keeps track of such things, wrote on Memorial Day that many communities abandoned the traditional parades years ago. She said the holiday, originally established to honor Civil War dead, was becoming nothing more than a chance for family barbeques and other outings preceded by heavily promoted sales of outdoor merchandise. I was shocked.


By gum, Plainwell, Michigan, hasn’t abandoned our parade. People decked out in red, white, and blue came from near and far. The Martin Fire Department even dispatched a truck, and their village is seven or eight miles away. Imagine that.


I lucked out. A little bench in front of the Plainwell Ice Cream Company, the most popular place in town during summer, miraculously was empty. There I perched for the whole show.


Just as I settled down, a white-haired man wearing a Veterans of Foreign Wars outfit sat down on the other end of the bench. As he rose to offer up a salute when the honor guard carried Old Glory past us, I noticed his shirt and trousers were crisply pressed, the brass insignia on his collar and cap sparkled, and his black shoes gleamed. I also noticed, as the procession continued, veterans and military personnel in the parade often SALUTED HIM as they passed by our bench.


Things like that still happen in small towns.


The parade was almost a replica of those held a half-century ago in my hometown, which is just about the size of Plainwell. The high school band tried mightily to stay in some sort of formation and deliver a martial air. Children, young and old, followed the band in various costumes and vehicles. Restorers of old cars and tractors showed off their prize possessions.


Floats (I use the term very loosely) sponsored by businesses, churches, schools, and other organizations appeared at intervals. Most were decorated trucks of various sizes and vintages. Three displayed signs honoring a Plainwell boy killed in Afghanistan just a week earlier (see previous post). After the parade, a special ceremony at the city’s veteran’s memorial monument honored him. That was nice.


Everything wasn’t solemn, though. Few others seemed to make the connection, but I doubled over in laughter after a business “float” followed by a dozen girls decked out in Uncle Sam uniforms had passed. A point of local pride is that boys from our county formed the Federal unit that captured Confederate President Jefferson Davis near the end of the Civil War. Apparently unaware of which side Michigan was on, the operator of a CD player on the “float” programmed it to blare out the strains of “Dixie.”


What the heck, nobody in the parade was a professional, except the cops who kept things in order and the firemen who showed off their equipment. After the last police car signaled the end of the procession, many of the bystanders headed for an ice cream social on the lawn of the Community Center. The social was conducted by volunteers to benefit a women’s shelter charity.


The VFW guy and his wife just got up without a word and headed, arm-in-arm, for their car, which was parked not far from mine.


Abandon the Memorial Day Parade? I’ll bet if that old vet hears of any such nonsense, he’ll personally march through Plainwell to keep it from happening.